in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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