I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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