I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
He shit in the fireplace
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
