Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
