It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
