If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
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