White coat. Heels.
I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I faked an abortion last night.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
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