i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Is it because I queefed?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
