Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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