I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
