It's Friday. Sex?
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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