I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize