The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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