apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
