you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Ketchup is God's man juice
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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