maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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