Pappa wants mamma naked
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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