We named our party play list daddy issues
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
I know her cup size but not her name....
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
