then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
