WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
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