im drinking this country out of the recession.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize