WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
operation have a gay friend backfired
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
