This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize