I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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