Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
