spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Randomize
