I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
