Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize