Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
