shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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