Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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