So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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