talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I cannot find my penis.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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