I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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