Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
