I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
She bit a glass in half.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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