just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize