she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
