spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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