Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize