After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
