Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
