Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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