Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
