DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
