Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize