He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
