Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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