I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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