She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
