You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
